I’ve been going through my old abandoned blogs over the past couple days, trying to get everything moved over here. It’ll be a bit crazy when I do, seeing as it’ll put all my writing from the past 7 years in one space. Crazy. But it’s been really fun to go through and read my old thoughts. I’ve actually only gotten through my high school material thus far, and I can’t help but shake my head at how overly melodramatic I was then. Of course it’s to be expected, but I really thought I was a very level headed girl back then. I guess this is where I say something about hindsight, huh?
Anyway, in the process of going through the blogs, I’ve come across a number of gems. Some of them are kinda ridiculous, but some of them are just flat out GOOD. It makes me sad how little confidence I had in my writing back then. I’ve finally started writing songs again (rather than just once every year and a half or so), and reading everything I wrote back in high school really makes me wish I’d been writing this whole time. My songs really were not as bad as I thought they were. Some of them were/are actually pretty darn good, especially considering I wrote them at 15, 16, 17. I can only hope that I can make up for it these days.
This is a little bit of a song called “Restless Spirit” that I found in one of my very very old blogs, dated January 7, 2002. Which puts me at 16. I actually remember writing this song and I remember liking it for a little while, and then soon thinking that it was garbage. I’m not really sure what happened to the rest of it, I didn’t come across it when my parents moved last year, which means I most likely don’t still have the rest of it. That makes me all kinds of sad, because I really love it now.
Well I’m a restless spirit lying here at midnight, still awake
And all I really wanna do is get a little sleep.
But the only thing that’s on my mind is how I’m still a slave,
‘Cause I slave to the creation of lyric, verse, and song.
So while everyone else admires, all I seem to do is create,
And beauty becomes so commonplace it’s sometimes hard to see.
So maybe I’m just different and have things I want to say,
But knowing that does nothing for me except keep me awake.
